Finding Me

Happy National Adoption Month:  To promote awareness for children in foster care in the United States. It began  as National Adoption Week in 1976 by Governor Michael Dukakis and it was declared by President Reagan in 1984. Then it was expanded to a whole month by President Clinton. 

The Adoption Series will feature those in the adoption triad: The Birth Family, Adoptee, Adoptive Family. There may be differing opinions among those in the adoption community and that is ok. It is important to respect other's opinions and sometimes one can learn from someone's different opinions. 

This week in The Adoption Series: The Adoptee. The following post was written by an Adoptee. 

Please Remember that this post doesn't represent the opinions or experiences of all adoptees. This post only represents this adoptee's thoughts and opinions.

When I was in middle school, I loved playing sports and my favorite sport to play was football. Waking up early in the summer morning for practice, laughing with my friends on the sidelines, and fighting for each other on the field was the best. In football I wasn’t tall enough to play lineman and I wasn’t quick enough to play wide receiver, but what I could do was throw the ball. Every day in evenings when my dad got home from work I would ask him if we could go to the park and play catch. It was so much fun throwing the ball around with my friends and pretending like we were pros.  However, things changed and during my freshman year, I quite football after three weeks of practice and changed to running cross country. Why the change you might ask? I didn’t stop because I lost interest, but I simplycame to the realty that I wasn’t supposed to play football. You see I am an Asian guy and I also happen to not be the tallest person in the world. During my freshman year, I was faced with the reality that it didn’t matter how good I could throw if I couldn’t see over the guys in front of me. I was throwing blind. After a few really rough practices I decided football wasn’t for me. Now this was very tough time in my life for me, because it was hard watching my friends, who I grew up with, play the sport I loved.  Now I know this happens to most of us at some point in our lives where we realize that our bodies can’t match the things we want them to accomplish, but for me it was really tough as the only Asian in a school with all white kids. Also, being different didn’t stop at sports either. In high school, there was this girl I liked, and we had been friends a long time and had a variety of classes together. She was nice and sweet and she was the girl everyone wanted to be friends with. My sophomore in high school I asked her out and to my dismay she told me that she wasn’t interested in dating Asians, but still wanted to be friends. Now I get everyone has preferences and I understand that she has hers, but that didn’t stop the internal pain and rejection that I look happened every time I looked into the mirror. 

​For me, the hardest part of growing up was always being different from everyone else. Different from my parents, my teachers, and my friends. It was stressful, and now that I look back, I wish I had more connections with other Asians my age.

​However, I also want to add that as an adopted kid that things aren’t always going to bad, the key dealing with my struggles is controlling the things you can and letting go of the things you can’t because at the end of the day the only person I could be was me. 

​On the cross-country team, I made varsity my freshman year and was Captain the year after that. It wasn’t football, but because I worked hard I was able to find success as something I worked very hard for. I loved running so much that later in college I managed to run my first marathon.  My junior year in highschool I started dating this really cute American girl who I met in theater club. We aren’t dating today, but we grew as people together and shared a lot of happy memories. In college, I started to learn Chinese and made a few Chinese American friends who I consider good friends. So if there is any other adoptee out there reading this, I hope to tell them that it gets better and that I hope they aren’t afraid to be themselves. 

Please follow A Word with Liu Miao on Instagram: awordwithlm to receive updates about new posts and a peek into my life.

Sharing to Much?

Happy National Adoption Month:  To promote awareness for children in foster care in the United States. It began  as National Adoption Week in 1976 by Governor Michael Dukakis and it was declared by President Reagan in 1984. Then it was expanded to a whole month by President Clinton. 

The Adoption Series will feature those in the adoption triad: The Birth Family, Adoptee, Adoptive Family. There may be differing opinions among those in the adoption community and that is ok. It is important to respect other's opinions and sometimes one can learn from someone's different opinions. 

This week in The Adoption Series: The Adoptee. The following post was written by me, Liu Miao. I am a Chinese adoptee. I love to blog and eat. Adoption is very important to me. I love to help bring awareness and educate others about adoption. I have a lot of opinions about adoption, but it is so important to hear from other adoptees, adoptive families, and birth families so this is why I started The Adoption Series.  

Please Remember that this post doesn't represent the opinions or experiences of all adoptees. This post only represents my experiences and opinions. 

Most of use social media to share about our lives to friends and families. Social media is also used to keep connected with people. I have noticed in the adoption community that there is a tendency to share about adopted kids and their journey. Sometimes these accounts are public too. No I don't think it is always bad to share about your adopted kids. Sharing on social media can encourage another fellow adoptive parent, bring awareness about adoption or help educate someone about adoption.

I think that there is a point of sharing too much online. Adopted kids have a special story and sometimes it isn't appropriate to share it verbally or online. There comes a time when the kids need to be the one to share their story especially as they become older. You may say that my kids are very young. I would suggest that one doesn't share to many details about their story to the public ( unless it is like the doctors or another situation calls for detail).  Some kids may not care if their story is shared. It depends on each person. I would suggest asking your kids because sometimes they may be afraid to hurt your feelings.  Even as an adult adoptee, I don't always share the specific details of my adoption story because there are some details that don't need to be shared on the blog or Instagram. Remember before posting or speaking with someone, is this a detail that needs to be shared? If my child was an adult, would they be ok if this detail was shared on social media or verbally to someone.  Just something to consider.

~Liu Miao~

College Life Lessons

Currently I am in my last year of undergrad. My experience are different from those who attend a big university and my university is very small. There are so many lessons that I have learned while in college. I do not claim to be an expert or have all the answers, but I wanted to share some life lessons from college.

• Take advantage of the student resources such as the gym, printing, computer labs, tutoring, writing center, and career center. This is where some of your money goes towards. These resources are very help for college classes, applying for jobs or graduate schools, and finding a job.
• Make connections with professors and or TAs. This is helpful for two reasons. First, talking and asking questions can help you understand the class better. Second, professors are more willing to write recommendation letters if they know who you are.
• Join an organization. This is great because it allows you to relax and have fun. Classes are so important but having some fun is also important. This also allows you to make new friends that have similar interests.
• It is ok if you change your major. People change as they grow older and this includes their interests. Sometimes a person discovers new interests and realizes what they want to do as a career. I do recommend changing your major before it is too late so you don’t have to take extra classes. I changed my major at the second semester of sophomore year. I wasn’t affected by changing majors since I was taking vote classes up to the beginning of my second semester of sophomore year.
• Writing papers are actually important. Many jobs require some form of writing and it is important to present your thoughts effectively whether it is for a book, marketing, a proposal.

I would love to hear your life lessons from college!

~Liu Miao~

These are a few of my favorite things

Hello readers! Today I wanted to share a few of my favorite products that I have discovered . I love it when I can find a great product and want to share with you guys. Who doesn’t love finding great products? This list will include a variety of products. Note: This post is Not Sponsored by the brands mentioned in this post.

• Milk Bones : minis. One box is around $4 and you get like 200 treats. I love using them for obedience training with my dog.

• A selfie stick. Yes I know this sounds a little selfish ( no pun intended). You can do more with a selfie stick than just take selfies. Selfie sticks can be used to record videos. 

• Bluetooth earbuds. I recently got a pair for my birthday and I love them. They were $21 at target. 

• To All the Boys I’ve loved before series by Jenny Han. I checked out the series at my library and I loved it. I also watched the movie. It is nice to see an Asian American girl as the main character and she isn’t portrayed as stereotypical Asian girl. 

• GRE: prep, practice, flash cards. This app is really helpful and free. It gives explanations to problems, see results , and it has review concepts. You can do practice tests and mini quizzes by subject ( quantitative and verbal). The only bad thing is the app doesn’t include help in the writing section. 

• Canva app. I use this app to create images for my blog and Instagram. You can create flyers, posters, images for Twitter (cover) ,Facebook (cover) YouTube, business card, logs, kindle image, album covers, Instagram stories filters, and Snapchat filters. There are different templates or create your design. There are something things you can buy but you have so many free options in the app.

I would love to know what your favorite products. Have a great day.

~Liu Miao~

Snacks to bring to college classes

Snacks for college classes.

Hello readers!

College classes are starting soon. Some students may have started already depending on the university. Who eats in their college classes? I eat in most of my classes because my classes are during times I would normally eat. It is important to be considerate of others when eating in class. Foods that are noisy for example chips or foods with a strong aroma can be very distracting.

• Fruit. I love eating grapes or melons. It is helpful to have the fruit cut up in smaller pieces.

• Chocolate is also another great snack to have. It is helpful to open your chocolate before class so you won’t make too much noise. Sometimes I put my chocolate in a small container with a lid so I don’t have to deal with wrappers from the chocolate.

• Smoothies is a great snack. It isn’t to noisily. This is also a healthy snack option. Please don’t slurp with your straw when you get to the end of your drink.
• Peanut butter sandwiches or other types of sandwiches are good options. Sandwiches are generally not noisy when eaten.

I hope that everyone has a great year. What are some of the snacks you bring to your college classes? 

Have a great weekend

~Liu Miao~

Life Update

 

Hello readers. Today I thought that I would share what is going on  in my life recently. It has been awhile.

 I finished my Junior/Third year of university. Time has flown so quickly. I started blogging towards the end of my first year of university. Now I only have two semesters left! This summer I am studying for the GRE and looking at schools to apply for graduate schools. IF you have any tips for the GRE or graduate school application, please let me know.  In the fall, I will continue with a research project and we hope to get a paper in the process of publication in the spring. I love the field os psychology and learning Spanish.

I am also training my own service dog. Her name is Mi Gemela Dulce which translate as My Sweet Twin. Currently she is learning basic obedience and doing good with house training. I am also working on teaching her tasks that she will need to learn. We are working on retrieving things.(Future tasks will include: Retrieving things, helping with shoes and clothes, pushing buttons, pulling doors, finding someone when I have a bad fall. I hope to get her approved for light mobility when she is old enough.) She enjoys going to puppy class and she is almost 14 weeks old. The puppy class helps socialize her with unfamiliar dogs and gives me tips on how to better train my dog.

Isn't she the cutest? She is not hyper but does have moments of energy. Whenever she is very tired, she will lay down wherever she pleases and does not move. I would love to know your tips about training dogs for service work.

What are you doing this summer? I would love to hear about it.

~Liu Miao~

What's in my purse: Spoonie Edition

Hello readers! I hope all of you are well.. Today I will share about what I keep in my purse as a spoonie. Remember every Spoonie is different and what to carry in their purse/bag will vary. I like to use a tote bag or a medium size crossbody bag. Here is what I keep in my bag:

• Water
• Tylenol
• A snack (sometimes more depending how long I will be out)
• My insurance card
• A pen and sticky notes
• My phone
• Socks
• Hand sanitizer
• Wipes
• Kleenex
• Something to fidget with if I am in a lot of pain. Like a stress ball to use during classes.

I would love to know what you keep in your bag as a spoonie?

Have a great day!

~Liu Miao~